Learning how to understand the signs of sexual tension will go a long way in helping you learn how to pick up women and even more so how to make sure that once you pick a girl up, that you close the deal and sleep with her.  Learning how to pay attention to your environment and pick up on the social and physiological cues from the girl you are interacting with will go a long way in accelerating your journey down the learning curve as it pertains to hooking up with women.  The sooner you can learn to relax and split your attention between what you are doing and the signals she is sending back to you, the sooner you will find yourself in bed with her.  Getting good with women not only requires determination with regards to trying new things, it also requires that you learn how to interact with your environment more sensitively than you are accustomed to.

One of the first thing that many guys are surprised to learn when they finally find themselves consistently escalating with women in a sexual way is the fact that even though a girl is obviously aroused and wanting to move forward with the interaction, she will often do and say things to interfere with what is going on.  Early in my ‘career’ I would often take some of their antics literally and walk away from what was unbeknownst to me as a prime opportunity to have sex because I was only focused on the words that where coming from their mouths.  Later on as I began paying attention to what was going on and putting myself in the girls shoes (not literally!) I began to understand that women often have conditioned reactions to becoming aroused due to a variety of factors ranging from social pressure (not wanting to look like a slut) to very real concerns about safety or becoming pregnant.  As I became more proficient at noticing the physical signs of sexual attraction in women, my ability to seduce women took off.I learned that in order to overcome last minute resistance, I needed to push comfort and pay close attention to the fact that often what the woman was saying to me contradicted the signals her body was giving me. I learned to tune into the nonverbal cues they where giving me without getting upset with some of the barriers they would throw up to prevent the seduction from going full course.

I’ve already gave my disclaimer about when a girl says ‘no’ or ’stop’ but Ill say it again anyways.

I am not about rape or anything that comes anywhere near that.  Once again I want to make very sure that if someone tells you to ’stop’, you  stop escalating.  ’Stop’ will have different meanings depending upon the context it is being said.  Usually, if a woman is worked up and says ’stop’, she is simply  telling you to slow down and stay with what you are doing.  Women usually take a little longer to warm up and get in the mood than most men do.  In fact, this starting and stopping of the ESCALATION can work in your favor as it builds sexual tension.  There is a rhythm to escalation.  Each time you escalate, or push the physical interaction forward, it is an uncomfortable jump for both you and the girl.

As the man, it is your job is to escalate.  You stick your neck out at each bend in the road and deal with things in a patient and understanding manner in such a way as to allow her the most comfortable experience as possible.  Sometimes this will also mean that you escalate for her.  You make things alright for her.  Women want to have sex and do dirty things just as much as men do, but they have many more obstacles to overcome than we do.

There is a general path that most people take when going from ‘never touched’ to ‘doing it’.  While the path is slightly different for everybody, if you venture to fast from that path, or attempt to jump too far ahead — expect to encounter resistance.  If you do that, and there is no resistance, you are probably dealing with someone who has a history of being sexually abused.  More likely than not they will become cold and emotionless as you press forward.  My advice to you if you encounter this is to back off and let the interaction go.  You will find that as you become better and better at picking up women, you will start to become pickier and you will have less desire to deal with some of the things that you would have ignored in the past.  This is a definite sign that you are leaving the land of scarcity and  entering the realm of sexual abundance.

It is good to keep in mind that your role is to escalate while constantly building comfort, and it is her role to protect her social status and at the same time be allowed to deal with all of the conflicting feelings and emotions that come with getting sexual with a stranger at a faster rate than she is used to.  You are a pick up artist, you are a rarity among all of the chumps she is used to dealing with.  As such, you understand where she is coming from and you are at ease with the process.  Your ability to relax and remain comfortable during this process will help her to calm down and relax as well.

You may notice that I have said little in the way of actual techniques to deal with last minute resistance.  First off, every situation is different and as you gain more and more experience, you will learn different ways that are specific to your nature that will be effective in dealing with this.  Secondly, by nature, doing things that are in congruent will necessarily create discomfort in you, which will in turn make the woman feel discomfort.  With some women, doing take aways and freeze outs are the right thing to do, with others you may find that doing that completely ends the interaction.  By the way, never ever ever punish a woman because she gives you resistance.  Last minute resistance should always be interpreted by you that YOU haven’t created enough comfort for the woman to allow further sexual escalation.  Remember that.

You will find that as you get better and better sexually escalating with women that last minute resistance all but disappears and if you do encounter it, it is usually only much earlier on in the interaction because the woman can sense that something is going to happen anyway and she needs to give her token resistance so that she can be let off the hook socially.  You may hear lines like:

“Just so you know, Im having my monthly vist”, or

“I can’t stay for long because I have to go home and get up early for an appointment”, or

“My boyfriend says…”

The reason why they say things like this is because in their minds, they need to feel as if they are not accountable for anything that may happen.  The way each woman does this is as different as each woman’s finger print.  Look for it, and when you hear it, don’t make a big deal about it or tell her that you know why she is saying what she is saying.  Acknowledge what she is saying and move on like it is no big deal.  Most of the time I will look at her as if I hear what she said yet continue on as if nothing was said.  The last thing you wan’t to do is give her a rational argument about the benefits of sleeping with you.

“I told him I had a boyfriend” translates to “it was all his fault, I tried to make sure nothing slutty happened so that means I am not a slut!”

When I  hear these token signs of resistance, I know that the girl wants to have sex with me and she is attempting to clear a path for herself so that it is ok to proceed.  I usually deal with these token barriers with humor or I simply say nothing and don’t show any sign or reaction to them.  As a man, this is part of my job.  At this point, you are looking to get the both of you to start focusing on FEELINGS, logical talk is the very last place you want to go.  Any conversation that happens is fun and light — without much need to build further attraction so lighten up on the cocky/funny.  You aren’t a dancing monkey.

Getting mad, impatient or upset due to any bit of resistance she throws your way will kill the interaction.  Period.  Only chumps who never get laid get all upset and pissed off when a girl says ‘no’ to them.  Even if you are somewhat new to all of this and aren’t living in abundance, your job is to appear as if you do.  Fake it till you make it!

Remember these general rules:

• don’t escalate sexually until you are at a place where you will be able to close the deal
• never let any bit of resistance she gives you rattle you in any way
• expect her to do and say things so as to dismiss accountability on her part and preserve her social status (she can’t look like a slut in your eyes or in anyone else’s should they find out she slept with you)
• unless it’s a firm ‘get off me’, if she says ‘no’ yet continues to kiss and touch that means you should back up and stick with what she is comfortable with and wait to escalate until a bit later (little side note: if you are wondering if you should be escalating or not, chances are pretty good you should have at least 5 minutes ago!)
• never punish a woman for doing her job and trying not to look like a slut, your job is to show that you are comfortable with everything and that you understand where she is coming from
• it is always your job to move the interaction forward
• sexual escallation has a rhythm to it — one step forward … hang out and let her get comfortable … one step forward … one step back … wait and let her get comfortable… no timidness, but no rushing either.  When its time to escalate, escalate!
• in order for you to sexually escalate, you must be in the mood yourself.  Once you get there, let your urges guide you as to what to do next.  Having sex is a primal instinct, its hard wired into your body.  Even the freaky stuff — just take it slow and pay attention to her reactions
• resistance on her part = not enough comfort, if you are working on building comfort both physically as well as mentally, you will find that last minute resistance all but disappears
• comfort is also built psychologically by showing that you are NONJUDGMENTAL.  This is VERY important for a variety of reasons.  If you want a freak in bed, how is she ever going to feel comfortable doing dirty things with you when she see’s you making a big fuss over the way someone dresses or the fact that you think poor people are beneath you?  Most girls are insecure and notice things like that.  The minute they see you judging someone else, they start wondering to themselves how you are judging them!  Don’t do it.  Period.  Even if she does and tries to get you to join in.  You are too high value for the need to put other people down!
• When the both of you are working on doing the horizontal mambo, it is not the time for rational discussion.  She may attempt to escape the sexual tension by throwing logical conversation into the mix.  Do not be a part of it.  You don’t acknowledge that which you do not want to be a part of your reality.  Likewise, if you see that she is having emotional reactions, it is not the time to talk about what is going on or ask if she is ok.  The time for talking is after you have had sex, not before!
• One more thing:  the words “I’m sorry” or “sorry” should never cross your lips throughout the entire process, the only reason I can possibly see why you would have to say that is if she is down there licking your undercarriage and you accidentally break wind.  Even then the apology should wait till you are basking in post-coital afterglow.
• Last but not least — remember at all times that you are learning a skill set and as such you need to be easy on yourself and have a sense of humor about things when they don’t go right.  Not only will you learn faster with a flexible mindset, but you will certainly enjoy things a heck of a lot more.

Enjoy the ride!